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~ Recipe: Observe, think, and feel. Then create.

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Category Archives: Weddings

The Place I Write – My Study Tells the Story of My Life

24 Thursday Jan 2013

Posted by sillisoup in Art and Creativity, Family, Philosophy, Random Thoughts, Weddings

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Note:  This post is written in response to the WordPress Writing Challenge: The Devil is in the Details

my studyThe room faces east, so in the morning, my favorite time to write, the sun streams in the large double window and glows off the terra cotta walls.  In fact, I must reluctantly adjust the blinds to block the rays that hit my face as I sit on one of the two comfy patchwork-patterned club chairs with laptop, my first cup of coffee  on the table beside me.  This room more than any other in my house is a warm embrace filled with the story of my life.  Each of the many family photos hanging on the walls and littering the tops of file cabinet, desk, sewing-machine table, and bookcase  has its own story to tell.  The one on top of the photo-printer of my Mom with her four small children on the grass in front of our home in the “projects” in Cleveland  shortly before my father abandoned our family and her long odyssey into poverty-stricken single motherhood began.  The one of my sister Susan smiling from an outdoor cafe table some forty years later when the five of us returned on what we called the Pilgrimage to Cleveland so our Mother could revisit the city where she grew up, married, and gave birth to four of her five children.  The nose-to-nose portrait of my two happy, beautiful daughters that they had made as a Christmas gift for their parents ten years or so ago when they were still in their twenties.  The close-up of the flawless, wide blue-eyed baby face of my niece, born following three miscarriages to my “baby” sister, whose only heart’s goal in life was to have children.  The snuggling, smiling heads of my Mom and my only brother who spent every week day with her during the two years of her treatment for the cancer that ultimately took her life. The portrait of me taken by the College PR department when I began my 25 year career at Ivy Tech, a favorite of my Mom’s that hung on her picture wall until her house was sold.  I never liked the picture much, but it was her favorite of me, and now I’m thinking I looked much younger, thinner, prettier then.  Pictures of my children, brothers and sisters, nieces, nephews, even one of my ex-husband playfully kissing the cheek of my brother-in-law, all carrying stories of the joys and sorrows of their own lives.  It could be overwhelming – but somehow it’s mostly reassuring to know my place among them.

The other clutter in the room comes from piles of projects.  Magazines to be read, binders and files full of papers to be put away or dealt with.  I’ll turn 65 this year, so there’s a tote-bag full of information on Medicare to wade through.  A box of travel information and mementos that I will use to help me sort and identify the 1500 or so photos I took on my trip with friends this past summer to Hungary, Austria, Yugoslavia, and the Czech Republic.  So much to do.

IMG_2165In one corner of the room, my large desk is surrounded by and cluttered with items of form and function.  I love the framed print by N. A. Noel on the wall above it of a little Amish girl holding a white cat.  It looks so much like my younger daughter and Happy, the cat we had when my girls were growing up.  A tearful Rachel held that cat in her arms years later when, old and ill, it was put to sleep.  Next to that hangs a canvass print of a photo I took of the reading room of the Library of Congress – my Mecca – on that lucky day when a friend and I happened to visit it on a rare day that it was open to the public and photography was allowed.   On the short side of the desk corner wall are four square painted canvasses depicting keyboard symbols  &, !, @, and “.  The chrome and brass desk lamp came from a shopping trip in Indianapolis many years ago during a visit with my friend Sarah One, so designated because of the later acquisition of my friend Sarah Two.  And then, there’s the pencil mug, the Gertrude Stein in the shape of her harsh square face, ears and all, with the small figure of Alice B. Toklas perched on the handle.  This treasure I acquired from a catalog many years ago in another life when I was a stay-at-home mom, gardening, canning, and doing needlepoint.  Also holding desk tools is the green and gold stein, the only remaining memento from my undergraduate years.  And on, and on.  Amazingly, as crowded as the room is with memories and physical clutter, it’s still a restful place for me, a place of comfort.  All the unfinished chores will wait for me.  When I’m here, the lurking threat  of possible boredom disappears.  There will always be something interesting to do.  For now, though, the face of the  baby Ben alarm clock my sister gave me and the sunlight leaving the windows for the roof are reminding me that this day must move on.

Wedding Season, Part III

01 Wednesday Aug 2012

Posted by sillisoup in Family, Weddings

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Rachel and Brett’s Wedding Week

Place ring here.

Getting Gorgeous
The week of the wedding contained all the traditional wedding preparation activities, like the ritual mani/pedi fiesta for the bride, her sister Rebecca, her Mom (i.e. me), her sister-in-law to be Sarah, and her cousin Amanda.  We had a good time, although the designs chosen by some of the more adventurous members of the party challenged the creativity of the manicurists.  You’ll see those designs in the picture gallery posted below.  Rachel chose to have a little heart painted on her ring finger so Bret would know where to put the ring.

Rebecca goes glam.

Of course, hair and makeup for Rebecca, Rachel and me was part of the ritual for the wedding day.  Sergio Salvador, the official wedding photographer was on hand to capture those moments.  Rebecca went for the big-hair, glamorous  makeup and had false eyelashes for herself and Rachel.  Unfortunately, they turned out to be uncomfortable and both girls removed them before the ceremony ever began.  It was a great look while it lasted!  Rachel’s regular stylist did a beautiful up-do, as planned.  While we were at the salon, Frannie and Lucy were having their hair done by Amanda at our rental house.  All styles are displayed in the photo gallery.

Party Week
On Wednesday evening all the parents gathered for a parent-exclusive dinner with the bride and groom at the house I had rented for the week.  Madeline and Jedd and Amanda went out to dinner with Chrisi (Rachel’s best friend) and her husband Mike and managed to have a good time without us.  Tom and Sally had not yet met Bret’s parents, so this was a great opportunity for all of us to become better acquainted before all of the larger wedding events.  The house had a wonderful patio courtyard with a grill, so we (well, Bret) grilled pork tenderloin and paired it with a big green salad (and lots of wine 🙂 for a simple dinner and great conversation.

Nature Pointe

Thursday’s rehearsal and rehearsal dinner were held at Nature Pointe, the wedding venue.  After getting off to a bit of a rough (well, ruffled) start due to a booking overlap with another wedding party’s rehearsal, our rehearsal was both fun and productive and the picnic sponsored by the grooms parents, Judy and Jerry Aaker, was perfect.

Rebecca, as the wedding officiant, was a paragon of preparation (oooo…nice alliteration) and organization.  The flower girls and Henry, his Dad’s best man, took their roles very seriously.  On their own initiative, Frannie and Lucy practiced their pacing for the procession diligently and repeatedly while Rebecca worked with the rest of the wedding party.  Henry learned about how to hold his hands during the ceremony (relaxed behind his back) and managed during the actual ceremony to keep them there for a remarkably long time before they found their way to his pockets.

Judy Aaker, friends Jacque Martin & Caroline Kelly, & Lani Lucky (Bret’s sister)

Having the rehearsal picnic at the wedding venue was especially pleasant.  It was a great facility as the guests were able to visit and eat inside or out, and the pool was available for the guests who wanted to take advantage of it – like every one of the children!  Bret and Jerry grilled hamburgers and hot-dogs to accompany all the other delicious fixins’.  An added benefit was that the guests were able to become familiar with Nature Pointe and the somewhat complicated route to get there prior to the wedding day.

Sarah and Malkie Aaker (Bret’s sister-in-law and nephew)

The Silliman Family – Jeanne Albrecht, Mary Gibson, Emily, Wade Gibson, Tom and Sally Silliman

That evening, Bret and Rachel hosted a cocktail gathering at their home, so the party just continued!  On Friday, Rebecca arranged for a cocktail hour at the upstairs outdoor lounge at Seasons in downtown Albuquerque so that the out-of-town guests could gather and spend time together with the Bret and Rachel and some of their in-town friends.  Wedding Week was pretty much Party Week.

The Big Ta Da!
After a year of planning and a week of preparation and partying, the big event began at Nature Pointe on Saturday, June 30, 2012.

Approximately ninety guests, many of whom arrived on the specially decorated school-bus (how appropriate since both bride and groom are teachers) shuttle, gathered on the spacious patio for an outdoor ceremony at 5 PM.

The wedding party was all family.  Looking incredibly handsome, Henry was his Dad’s best man and Lucy and Frannie led the procession as flower girls.  Tom and I escorted Rachel up the “aisle” we had configured on the patio where the guests were seated.  Rebecca officiated her sister’s wedding.  The ceremony was a heart warming combination of traditional and non-traditional and was highly personal thanks to her having submitted questions to the bride and groom ahead of time.  Jerry Aaker, father of the groom, provided the benediction at the end of the ceremony, and at the beginning and end of the ceremony Rachel’s aunt, Mary Gibson sang songs   Rachel and Bret had chosen.

My heart was so warmed to see the great happiness and love that was so evident in  Rachel and Bret’s faces as they held hands and spoke the vows prepared by Rebecca with such care and love.

Then, of course, we all, family and friends did what we all do best – party!  The band, Le Chat Lunatique, played their jazzy-bluesy songs as we ate, mingled inside and out, and danced the night away (well, until 10 PM).  Sergio and his assistant were on hand throughout, and here’s a link to the whole shebang.
Rachel and Bret Wedding Pictures – Sergio Salvador
If you prefer a smaller collection, I selected some of my favorites and they are posted below along with some I took during the week. (Click on any one image to view a carousel of enlarged images.)

Still to Come:
“Wedding Season: Afterword
– Yours, Mine, and Ours: reflections on the importance of family, friends, and chosen family” and
“Amanda and Jedd Wedding – Memories & Reflections from MOB, Madeline Harris”

Rebecca goes glam
Nature Pointe
Judy Aaker, friends Jacque Martin & Caroline Kelly, & Lani Lucky (Bret’s sister)

Sarah and Malkie Aaker (Bret’s sister-in-law and nephew)
The Silliman Family – Jeanne Albrecht, Mary Gibson, Emily, Wade Gibson, Tom and Sally Silliman
















Wedding Season, Part II

29 Sunday Jul 2012

Posted by sillisoup in Family, Weddings

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Rachel and Bret’s Wedding

I’ve been working on sorting out all the myriad activities, events, and emotions surrounding Wedding Week in Albuquerque while meanwhile dealing with current activities, events,  and emotions and planning for a major vacation trip. (Life is so relentless!)  Conclusion: there’s no way to sort it out in any sequential way, so I’ll continue the random approach.

THE ROAD TRIP

Madeline, the newlyweds Amanda and Jedd, and I headed out for Albuquerque the Saturday before the wedding in my Prius.  The trip was two days of driving each way, but all of us are still friends.  We and our luggage fit remarkably well in what is essentially a pretty small car, and we had books on CD to keep us entertained.  Also, while we drove Jedd read the entire owner’s manual for the car and informed me of several features I was not previously aware of.  I love a curious mind!

Jane keeping warm at Montana Mike’s

Jedd and Amanda huddling for warmth

On the way out, we stopped for the night in El Reno, Oklahoma, just west of Tuscon.  My friend Jane and her son Ryan and his two dogs were driving to the wedding on the same weekend, and we met in the hotel and went out to dinner at a Montana Mike’s steakhouse that had refrigeration in the dining room.  Temperatures outside were in the 90s, but we wrapped up in whatever sweaters and blankets we could scrounge from our cars.

Cadillac Ranch Amarillo, Texas
The highlight of the road trip for me was our visit to Cadillac Ranch near Amarillo, Texas on our way home.  This iconic piece of public art is an essential part of any Route 66 (now I-40) journey that passes through this part of the country.   I love public art, and this one is so deliciously democratic!  As we approached on foot several hundred yards off of the frontage road that provides access to the site, we were shocked to see all the litter strewn on the ground. But as we got closer we realized that this was very specific litter: exhausted spray paint cans and lids of every color. Legalized graffiti!  And yet, those cars are in somebody’s field, so the thrilling sense of the illicit can be conjured up by the rebel artist wishing to make his mark.  It was a windy day when we stopped, so we had to be careful to avoid the cloud of spray paint as we approached.  My interest, of course was in photographing the cars.  I later realized, after doing some online research into the site, that many of my images had already been done by numerous others, often with far more dramatic skies to enhance them.  We were there at very close to high noon – not optimal for the best light, as any photographer knows.  But I still love my pictures.  Stopping here on the way home after an exhausting week made the journey feel more like a Road Trip and less like a long damn drive.  I still have the dream (fantasy?) of driving the Mother Road across the country, camera at the ready.  There was so much we saw as we zoomed home that I need to go back to explore and photograph.  It’s been done, I know, but there’s a reason for that.

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If you’re curious about the origins and history of  Cadillac Ranch, below are a couple of links.  If you want just a little more info, read this:

From Roadside America.com
…Cadillac Ranch was invented and built by a group of art-hippies imported from San Francisco. They called themselves The Ant Farm, and their silent partner was Amarillo billionaire Stanley Marsh 3. He wanted a piece of public art that would baffle the locals, and the hippies came up with a tribute to the evolution of the Cadillac tail fin. Ten Caddies were driven into one of Stanley Marsh 3’s fields, then half-buried, nose-down, in the dirt (supposedly at the same angle as the Great Pyramid of Giza).

From Wikipedia:
Cadillac Ranch is visible from the highway, and though it is located on private land, visiting it…is tacitly encouraged. In addition, writing graffiti on or otherwise spray-painting the vehicles is also encouraged…. The cars are periodically repainted various colors (once white for the filming of a television commercial, another time pink in honor of Stanley’s wife Wendy’s birthday, and yet another time all 10 cars were painted flat black to mark the passing of Ant Farm artist Doug Michels or simply to provide a fresh canvas for future visitors. In 2012 they were painted rainbow colors to commemorate gay pride day.)

Wedding Season – Part 1

19 Thursday Jul 2012

Posted by sillisoup in Art and Creativity, Family, Food, Lore, Weddings

≈ 1 Comment

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Amanda Harris, amanda harris willis, bret aaker, emily gibson, frances aaker, henry aaker, jeanne silliman, jedd willis, lucy aaker, Madeline Harris, rachel silliman aaker, rebecca silliman

Amanda and Jedd Willis
– photo by Erin McCracken

My family’s Wedding Season, as my sister Madeline has dubbed it,  is over, and the confetti is settling.  Amanda Harris (my niece) and Jedd Willis were married on May 26, and Rachel Silliman (my daughter) and Bret Aaker on June 30.  The weddings, like the couples, were very different; but both unions were sources of great happiness for the brides and grooms and for those of us who love them.  I have so much to say about Wedding Season that I’ll have to do it in installments.  This is Part One.  And let me just say that my musings will not necessarily be in chronological order.  On something this big, I find that a more stream of consciousness approach works much better.

The first “official” photo of newlyweds Rachel Silliman Aaker and Bret Aaker from the wedding photographer

Rachel and Bret’s Wedding
One thing I’ve learned as I contemplated writing about the week of my daughter’s wedding is that it’s difficult for me to blog without photographs.  My role as mother of the bride, or as we call it, MOB, limited my ability to walk around shooting pictures of everything.  In retrospect, I wish I had photographed more of the casual moments when no one would have cared that I was poking a camera into her face.  Ah, well, the lifelong list of lost photo ops is long.  I did take some.  As we go along, I’ll illustrate with those taken by others and  with the ones I did take.

The wedding party as depicted by flower-girl daughter Lucy Aaker, age 7

The wedding party as depicted by daughter and flower girl Frances Aaker, age 7

So, the wedding.  First of all, in my mind I’m calling it our Big Fat American Wedding.  Not original, I know, but the description definitely gives you the flavor of  its social complexity.  But first some general statements:

  • After a year of planning, the wedding event was beautiful, happy, and as flawless as these things can be.
  • In spite of all surrounding chaos before, during, and in the aftermath of the wedding, Rachel and Bret were the sanest, calmest bride and groom I’ve ever seen .
  • Many people contribute to the success of such an event and, more importantly, such a union.

Frannie and Lucy Aaker strewing petals along the bridal path
– photo by Amanda Harris Willis

By way of follow-up to my earlier post about the dresses I made for Frannie and Lucy,  here’s Amanda’s picture of the girls as they led the wedding procession.

Since the MOB role prevented me from taking photos during the ceremony, I’ll refer you for now to the wonderful images posted by Rachel’s cousin Emily Gibson on her flickr account.  Her video of the dancing is especially appealing and features the children, the flower-girl dresses, and the bride and groom (not necessarily in order of importance). And here’s her image of the ceremony with the bride’s sister Rebecca officiating and Bret’s son, Henry serving as best man.

More to come on Wedding Season…. I warned you about the randomness.

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